Asanti Sana for Kenya (:

watching 天涯侠医 made me fall in love with Kenya and look!! omg don't the photos make you feel like going there NOW. D: i love that place. and yes, you're welcome husena dear for me rubbing salt into ur wounds ><>

ahh. damn nice. you won't even have to force me to wake up early. i'll rush out of bed every morning to see the sunrise :D and omg i want to see how tall the giraffes are. i mean yes i know they're damn tall compared to me -.- but they're so cute. neck so long. xD

爱一定 开在某个角落

sarah is scared =/ about the future, about the present, about the unknown.

i want something to turn out good. and last. just one thing. that isn't too much to ask for is it?

ahh. what difference does it make. i keep falling down and getting up and falling down and getting up again. and despite the number of times i keep doing that, i still believe. i wonder if it's called faith or just plain naiveness.

责备什么人也没有用 玫瑰都红 难免看错

sometimes i really wonder if i did the right thing choosing to come to RG/RJ. somehow or another, i feel stifled.

(oh i'm sorry. i meant RIJ.)

where oh where has my little zen gone ):

MY ZEN IS MISSING AND I SUSPECT SOMEONE STOLE IT. roar.

sarah misses her zen ): and i don't even have a picture to remind me of it )):

"If you don't think every day is a great day, try going without one."

There's a man dying on the side of the road
Won't make it home tonight
He was driving fast on a cellular phone
That's how he lived his life

While he was hanging by a thread
These were the final words he said

My girl turned sweet sixteen today
She's beautiful, so beautiful
It might get rough sometimes but I hope she keeps her faith
I wish I grabbed the chance to say to her
Life is too short so take the time and appreciate

And there's a woman crying on the kitchen floor
She got a call tonight
Now she's trembling outside her daughter's door
Walks in and holds her tight
Wondering how and where to start
Is there a way to shield her heart

My girl turned sweet sixteen today
She's beautiful, so beautiful
It might get rough sometimes but I hope she keeps her faith
I wish I grabbed the chance to say to her
Life is too short so take the time and appreciate

Anybody loving will
Get hurt along the way
Don't be afraid to open up
And use the time you have before it fades
Show your love today

My girl turned sweet sixteen today
She's beautiful, so beautiful
It might get rough sometimes but I hope she keeps her faith
I wish I grabbed the chance to say to her
Life is too short so take the time and appreciate

XOXO.

omg this photo is so unglam but it cracks me up everytime ><

UH. OKAY.

okay i just had the most horrible interview in my life.

i think i was so weirded out by the interviewers (no offence) that it probably showed on my face. i mean i was trying to be sincere so stop staring at me like i sprouted another head or sth. anw, i zombied out of the interview room thinking: okay. what the heck was that?

usually interviews like these turn out well, and i have like advocating experience, hello? *waves* and hello, so what if my lovely indian classmate wants to help the minority groups in Singapore, cannot is it!

ah well. i was half amused and half annoyed. i don't know whether to laugh or to cry so my face looks kinda weird now ): but i rly don't want to stay in floorball anymore and i wanna do community service luh.

sigh. breathe sarah breathe. everything will fall in place sooner or later. as pauline puts it very aptly: let their skins do the oxidising, not ours xD

which reminds me of redox reactions, which in turn reminds me of chem and my increasing pile of chem HW D: and there are ants all over my worksheets. WHY ARE THERE ANTS ALL OVER MY WORKSHEETS? as if the freaky looking alkenes compounds are sweet. they're not, so get lost you equally freaky looking six legged moving fullstops.

ugh. hungry. eat. now. yay.

School sucks.

- PLEASE REFER TO TITLE -

so thank God for my girls (:
and my two boys (:

Ryan and his shell.

Randall found sth small, round and black and called it "little onion" O.o

Ryan.

Randall.

Ryan.

The small one is hilarious ><

And that's what happens when i try to get them to take a proper photo tgt -.-

Happy Birthday To Me (:

I wrote that on my phone. and everyone who saw it gave me the LOOK.

heyy!! who says one can't wish herself happy birthday :D

i don't feel 18. xD and yes i don't look 18 either as many, many, MANY lovely people have taken it upon themselves to mention it to me today xP

anyway just a few days ago, i was rummaging through my old stuff and i chanced upon a diary that i kept back in primary sch and on to RG. no one was at home and so the house was super peaceful. the atmosphere was damn right when i sat down to flip through the pages. man, was i innocent last time la! xP and my handwriting was atrocious hahaha. so anyway, when i was laughing at my chicken scrawl, i came across something that made me stop short.

i was introducing myself to my diary (DON'T LAUGH AT ME), then i wrote "... and i'm very happy with life."

the simplicity and the sincerity of those 5 words made me realise how over the past 2 years no matter how "happy" i felt, there were always various problems nagging at the back of my mind. talk about wet blankets. but at that period when i wrote about how happy i was, it was just pure, unadulterated joy.

it made me smile, and yet it made me sad at the same time. at that split moment, i really really wanted to turn back time. to go back and slowly savour every second, every minute of happiness that i didn't cherish. to make right every wrong decision that i made. to save all the friendships that went wrong.

oddly, as i was reminiscing about my RG days, i thought about someone whom i haven't been talking to for an entire year, someone who left me feeling bitter about friendships. and strangely enough, i suddenly miss her. but then, that sensation went away as quickly as it came because by now, i'm used to telling myself that there's no use thinking about stuff that will upset me.

even though many people say that one shouldn't keep dwelling on the guilt and regret of the past, but honestly, i think that sometimes one needs to look back to be able to take a step forward, to put things in perspective.

so by some freaky coincidence or God's divine intervention, i just had the most unexpected birthday in my 18 years. i mean the celebration wasn't crazy but the things that happened blew my mind luh.

i mean i knew the situation for the more recent problem wasn't as simple as it looked, but i didn't expect that even the old OLD problem had a different side to the story. the weirdest part was that BOTH things had to surface and take a sudden turn on my birthday.

two of my previous best friends, two different problems but the same shocking revelation. i'm stilll unsettled from what happened today, and until now i don't know if i should be happy or upset. i'm thankful but it's like throwing the broken pieces away, then having to take them back and glue them together again.

just a while back i vowed to not ever care about anything anymore cos i don't want to get hurt again, i'm tired.

人需要学会拿得起放得下, 我放下了, 没事了, 让自己失去知觉. 但是事过那么久, 直到今天我才发现, 当自己发觉事情还有转地之余, 原来心还懂得动 ,眼泪还是会流

ultimately, even though i learnt not to be too dependent, to stay strong, i can never change the fact that underneath it all i'm still soft-hearted and friendships still mean a lot to me. no rushing, no second-guessing this time. let's all just start over again.

on a brighter note, thankyou pauline, husena, yen, hannah, huierh (who called all the way from UK!), siyun, jeryl, and the rest of my class plus hongye, charmie, meli, shihua, yingxuan, chuashiqi etcetc for making me happy today (: love you all!

MERRY VERY BELATED CHRISTMAS!!

AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR ((:

And yes, my new obsessions! :DD thanks to forensics 2.

Kevin Cheng (Zheng Jia Ying) and Charmaine Sheh (She Shi Man)

and i think they're a perfect match! they should just admit that they're together la and save the paparazzi the speculation. (:




i think they're damn cute. and they sing damn well together too :D
should see their NG scenes in forensics 2. bloody funny xP

But apparently Bryden says he's handsome but she ain't pretty. Yea right. That baboon only has eyes for "his" Tang Ning. and keeps pestering me for her photos. lazy bum, dunno how to go and find for himself :P
-----------------------------------------------

ERH LEFT FOR UK ): i'm damn sad. luckily i didn't go to the airport to send her off, if not i would have cried like nobody's business. just managed to catch her at her house right after she left to give her the scrapbook, class video and my card. take care erherh. and study harder alright!!

sigh next yr 09SO3B one less girl and we already have so little girls ):

i don't want school to start. i've been putting off all the problems and when school starts i have to face them all again. bleh. the only thing i'm looking forward to is that my smartypants cousin will be in RJ next yr and i can laugh at him :D

oh and also that pauline and i celebrating our birthdays tgt (: haven't seen her in a long long time ):

i mean honestly, what do you expect me to do now? you know when she asked me, i was lost for words. and there was this familiar sense of guilt. the bottomline is that now, it isn't my fault. i gave you an excuse to make the situation better. but i know there's still some stuff that you didn't tell me (just like the year before) and you probably never will. this is all damn silly can't you see? why can't this all just end?

new year, new beginnings. but how can something have a new start when there was never a proper conclusion?

maybe i'm still too coward to take bigger steps to change my circumstances. the short spurt of determination that i had a while back is starting to fade and i'm fumbling again. this calls for new year's resolutions! and i shall keep them for the whole year (hint hint husena xD)!

and cheer up jywj!! the world still continues to turn (: and yah you still have me as backup haha.

ZOMG i hate the paragraphing thing. i can never get it to work!